The Struggle to Get into Columbia University

I just got back from my interview with Dr. Adams and I am sitting here, crying my eyes out. I want; no I need to get into Columbia University. My mother needs me to help with the bills, and she needs me to continue going to school so that one day we would not be struggling so much anymore. My dad left us when I was about four years old, and never gave my mother child support or any other kind of help. My mom has done all she can. We even lived in a shelter home for a year after he left us. All this pressure to be a pediatrician, what I always wanted to be, and my mom's expectations from me give me so much stress. I cannot let my mom and my sister down, I cannot let myself down. There is not anything else I can think to do but cry. I have not dinner or anything. I am too mad at myself.
My mom came home from work at 3am and wakes me up to ask me how my interview went. I didn’t even want to look at her; I just said “Awful, I didn’t get it because I was late”. Why I didn't lie to her, I don’t know. I should have, but I just needed someone to talk about it with so I could get the weight off of my chest. As soon as my mom heard I was late, she says “Why were you late? I told you to be there early, this is your future, Oh my God, Olivia so what is going to happen now huh?”
“I don’t know mom I am going to try to get recommendations to see. I don’t know what to do anymore.”
“Damn it, you know I need your support here. Your sister Diana is too young to work and she needs to focus on her studies and you were the only one I was counting on to help me out here. What happened that you were late?"”
“Well, my umbrella broke and got soaking wet so I went to the bathroom to fix my hair and I didn’t realize my watch had stopped, and I guess I took too long in the bathroom, and was late.”
“Oh my god so you’re telling me you were late because you wanted to look pretty for the interview. Why didn’t you just go straight there? That was so stupid Olivia.”
“I’m sorry you are the one that always tells me to make sure I look presentable for the interviews, so I didn’t know. I’m sorry Mom, but what do you want from me? Its your fault too. You are never here for me; you are always at work and forget about your daughters.”
“What are you saying Olivia? This wasn’t my fault. The reason why I am never home is so you could have food and a roof over your head. Your father never gave you anything and I know I put pressure on you, but I really can’t do this on my own. Now I don’t have anyone to help, your grandmother is dead and your aunts are in Florida and have their own lives to worry about. So unless you want to go back to living in the shelter, you need to do something to get that interview back.”
“Okay mom! I get it but what if I don’t get it? What are we going to do then?”
“Then we will figure it out. Maybe I could try to get you a job in the hospital I work for or you could apply to other places. I am sorry I am putting so much pressure on you.”
“Okay I am going to try mom. I’m sorry I was late. And hey Diana is already 16 she could get a job too. She should apply at the library or something for the summer. For real mom, she is not a baby anymore.”
“I know but let her have her fun, she is still young.”
“That’s not fair! I didn’t have any fun. I was working since I was fourteen years old, when I was working in Tio Luis' grocery store, remember? I always made money to help her. You always treat her better than me, and let her do whatever she wants and I always get screwed working and having no social life. My life sucks!!!”
“Oh please Olivia, your life wasn’t bad. You are the older one and have to set the example. Don’t you want your sister to have the fun, and not have to go through the same struggle you went through?”
“No, she should learn to be independent and should work as hard as I work; she is eating the same way I am isn’t she. I am going to do whatever I can but if I can’t get it then I guess, we will have to buy less food or maybe make Diana move since she is the only princess here.”
“Okay Olivia I am not going to argue with you anymore. That’s enough. Just shut up and go to sleep. I will talk to you in the morning. I love you”
“I love you too mom …”
I am so mad; it so not fair that I have to go through this while my princess of a sister is hanging out with her stupid little friends all day, doing absolutely nothing to help out. I am going to talk to Professor Sanchez tomorrow. He was the best biology professor I ever had. Hopefully he will have an answer to my prayers because if not, this will always be my life, living at home wit my mom and my sister, struggling.